Now

When your life starts like this it is difficult ever to believe it when something positive happens to you. Continually you look for the down side, waiting on someone taking it away from you.

I mean you never deserved happiness did you? Why else did your life end up with everyone leaving you.

When you see something that is probably so innocent your sick mind won't let you believe that. I mean why would anyone want you in their life, can you blame them. You should be made to carry a warning around your neck, " Don't talk to this man! You will end up wanting to run a mile from him."

These are some of the things that go round in your mind when you've had a past like mine. You can't believe anything. You spend your entire life surrounded by people but letting no one in properly. Then when you eventually do you can't act normal, you can't accept the silliest thing as being innocent all you do is look for that signal when they will run away.

Always thinking is this it are they running now.


Often you can't explain why you feel this way but you do. Most of the time you have no right to feel the way you do. None of that stops you making the same mistakes all over again and causing everyone around you pain!!!!!